subnautica | Video

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[This is the first time Komeada has used the network to broadcast anything himself. He's smiling, though that's pretty typical for him, but there's a slight awkwardness to it.]

It would seem that by happenstance I've become a father.

[He sighs deeply, it is a rather purposeful sigh.]

I'm at a bit of a loss of what to do now though. I've been trying to look up information on how to go about it but the recourses are a bit lacking.

Biology was never really something I looked too deeply into. It seems a bit unlucky to be burdened by this so suddenly.

[He brightens at the next part though.]

However, I guess it is a rather lucky encounter to be bestowed a life to nurture!

Even though I was assaulted and insulted in the process.

[He sighs again, this one more genuine.]

Now I feel rather tired. So... yes, if someone could please help me, I don't really have enough stamina left to try and figure this out right now.

[And he does look rather drawn and tired. Paler than usual.]

[ That's when Undyne makes her grand appearance in the video feed, but not before setting off any number of crashes and explosions in the background? Did half the base just go up in flames? Sure sounds like it, but that's hardly important. Anyway... ]

What's up, buttmunches?! I'm a MOM now and if any of you losers even THINK about coming near MY egg-- [ She will fight Komaeda for it for custody!! Except not really. She'll share, just very badly, because that's Undyne. BUT EVERYONE ELSE STAY AWAY. ] --I'll make you regret it!

SO STAY AWAY FROM MY EGG!

[ A beat, and then: ] Oh! And uh... stay outta the Void, okay? It's too dangerous out there for you nerds.

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[His lips purse together at the mention of the other boy's luck. Honestly... there has to be a limit to how much he can rely on it, right? Though from what Souda told him about the trial involving Komaeda's death... it seems there's no limit to his faith.]

Don't mention it. [In response to his thanks, anyway. He doesn't even know how to go about responding to all that business about his luck, so he doesn't just yet, instead just slowly starting to walk toward the medbay, careful not to go faster than the other teen can handle.

But as for his question...]

Hang on. Tell me what decision you're thinking of reevaluating, first.

[He grows quiet to think about it. He had meant to have his question relate to it, but of course not in a way that made that relation obvious. Now he had to think of a different way to go about it.]

I'll come to that in a moment. But first; which is worse? Losing yourself, or losing your life?

Is this a trick question...?

[But he sighs through his nose, pausing a moment to think about it. Both of those are things he doesn't even want to consider as possibilities. That's a decision between two terrible things.]

I don't think either is worse than the other, [he says finally, brows knitting together again as he glances toward the other boy.] No matter how you look at it, "you" wouldn't be you anymore.

But if you had to choose between those two options, which would you choose? Though you stop being who you are with both options, one you get to be who you are until the end, while the other you stop being who you are... yet continue to exist. And won't even notice....

[He stops talking, as if he said too much or started to say too much and had to stop.]

[He doesn't answer immediately, though he does glance back toward Komaeda again. This... suddenly, he has a cold feeling he might know what the other could be referring to. One of those things he'd thought (hoped?) was just another one of Komaeda's lies.

For a long while, the only sound is the sound of their footsteps in the hallway.]

...I wouldn't choose either option, [he says finally, tilting his head to try to look the other boy in the eye.] I'd find another solution. After everything we've all gone through... there's no way I could just give up.

[He laughs, it's a bit hallow but his smile is genuine.]

Hinata kun, this is why you're quite amazing! No matter what, you keep hope and strive forward.

[That was one of the things he really liked about him.]

You know... I was really hoping you would kill me. Or at least someone would....

[He knew this wasn't a good topic to have right now, he knew how Hinata felt about all that. He also knew it would just remind him of what he had done in the end, but... it felt like things he had to talk about.]

I wasn't expecting to wake up....

Komaeda...

[He's quiet again, though the arm around the other boy's waist tightens in response to a sudden flash of anger. Anger, tempered with concern. He's still angry about what the other teen did -- did to himself, but also what Nanami had to go through. What they all had to go through, even if Hinata personally hasn't experienced it for himself. What Hanamura had to go through, being manipulated by someone like Komaeda. Abruptly, but not for the first time, he's reminded of a guilty wish that Komaeda had been killed, instead of Togami.]

You did, though. [His voice is stern, almost scolding, a hint of that anger seeping through.] You woke up in the kind of place where... where you can get help. Isn't that "luck?" Isn't that "hope?"

You were always going on about being a stepping stone for hope. Don't you think... you can think of that disease as something like that? Something you can overcome to achieve a greater "hope?"

[Maybe... he can't help but feel if he maybe puts it in the same kinds of terms Komaeda himself uses, that it'll have more of an impact.]

Edited 2016-09-29 18:41 (UTC)

Ah, but I got into Hope's peak because of it! That is definitely true hope and great luck.

[Even if he couldn't remember it, it couldn't have all been bad.]

I don't think there's much help here.

[It had been one of the first things he had looked into.]

It comes back to my question... is it better to die as who you are, or lose yourself completely?

[Even if he longed for a great hope and viewed hardship as a stepping stone, his bad luck and good luck already fed off each other. He was still practical (more or less) in his thinking and realistic in his expectations of presented facts. He had two choices, and still only had two choices. He was simply now doubting his original choice. He had lost time, and now he wanted more.]

And I'm telling you, neither of those are options.

[Through it all, he keeps their slow, steady march toward the medbay, though the frustration is becoming even more apparent in his tone.]

There's nanites that... repair cell damage, there's... this isn't Jabberwock Island, Komaeda. We're stuck in the kind of setting you read about in science fiction! I refuse to believe that with someone with Tsumiki's skills given all this technology that she can't synthesize something. Even if a cure doesn't exist right now, there are incredible people here. They'll help you.

The brain is very complicated Hinata kun. It's unrealistic to hope for a miracle cure for something like that.

[His tone was pointed and direct. He usually wasn't like this but he felt Hinata was being too fanciful and unrealistic right now. He liked the hope Hinata could hold onto, but the baseless assumption things will be this way because I want them to be was a little frustrating.]

Magic also doesn't seem particularly useful.

[Not that he actually talked to any of those people about the specific application of their magic he was looking into.]

But... I want to listen to what you're saying. My decision might have been wrong. But, I'm not sure. I don't know if I can trust changing my mind now.

[Because surly his choices made before were better choices than what he could have made now. He had somehow decided cutting off his own hand was a good choice. And he felt conflicted about a lot of things he had been quite steadfast in.]

No, you're wrong.

[His grip tightens again, almost hard enough to bruise now.]

Your thinking is too narrow. You can't just assume that things here are the same as things back home. I've seen... I've seen people who can fly, people who can teleport through walls. Mikleo's just invisible! There's ghosts and robots and a giant talking turtle.

We're in some kind of absurd parallel universe where the normal rules don't apply. So I'm not letting you give up. You've put us all through too much to get off that easy, just accepting something you think you can't change.

What decision did you make?

[He leaned in closer to Hinata trying to alleviate the pressure somewhat, though he couldn't gage what Hinata was feeling by the change in his grip.]

You're right, I at least owe that much I suppose.

[He still didn't regret his actions, he still felt they allowed for the right direction.]

I declined treatment since dying as who you are, with a clear mind is better than dying as someone else with a muddled mind.

But you think it's better to buy time and see if there's a way to save the mind, is that it?

You declined...!

[why.jpg. Hinata does let his grip relax when Komaeda leans closer, belatedly realizing that he might be hurting him. And while there's a part of him that whispers good at the idea of hurting the other teen, he forces that out of his mind, tries to stay calm. Even though his thoughts are reeling at the idea.]

It's the only option. Didn't I tell you? I'm not letting you get off that easy.

Either you talk to Tsumiki and Valentine and URSULA about treatment options, or I'll do it for you.

It will be a little embarrassing to talk to Valentine san again....

[Since he declined her as well.]

But you're right Hinata kun, I have a debt to pay so I should definitely not run away!

[He turned slightly so he could almost whisper in Hinata's ear.]

If it makes you feel better you can dig your nails in, I don't really mind. You can do whatever you want to me. But, if someone is in the medbay and wants to do an exam it might be a little damning, so please be careful.

Gnh-!

[Hinata flinches away from the breath in his ear, almost dropping his grip on the other boy entirely.]

Oi, Komaeda! Don't mess around!

[He almost falls, his only good hand clutching at Hinata's shoulder to keep him up.]

I'm not... messing around.

[He paused a moment, calculating.]

Or maybe everything is?

I don't know what you're talking about.

[He just fixes his gaze straight ahead rather than look at the other boy, letting his hand rest on his waist again just enough to give him support without threat of pressing too hard.]

I guess I just don't have the heart to do the same thing twice.

[There was a light laugh before shifting a little and leaning more on Hinata. It really took more effort to lie than he had right now.]

Thank you, for putting up with garbage like me.

...

[He sighs, shaking his head. He's incredibly tired after dealing with all this; why is Komaeda always such a source of stress...?

Either way, he shifts to support the other's weight better and turns the corner to the medbay.]

You don't have to thank me for something like that.

Edited 2016-09-29 21:22 (UTC)

But I still want to, because it means a lot. It's important to express appreciation.

[It was polite.

Once they turned the corner for the medbay he started thinking about what he needed, in case no one was currently there.]

If we can find ferrous sulfate that should do for the moment, or darbepoetin alfa might be better for the long run. If neither iron tablets should be fine.

...You're welcome.

[Maybe try doing something that doesn't make me question why I spend time with you...?]

Darbepoe...

[He gets tongue-tied and just doesn't even try, frowning as he glances to the other boy and leads him into the room.]

Do you know what that might look like?

Um....

[He knew how to say it, and he might recognize it? He thought for a moment.]

I might recognize it if I saw it. I can read the word Sulfate and probably narrowing down bottles with Alfa would help.

Or! I can just pick one and go with whatever it is.

We're not using your luck. Sit down, will you?

[For as exasperated and slightly annoyed as his voice is, he's still fairly gentle as he lowers Komaeda to the closest bed. Then it's to the medicine cabinet. He can read the labels thanks to the translator, but it's still all weird medical speak to him.]

Um...

[Where's Valentine or Tsumiki when you need them...? He carefully goes through the different cabinets, finally emerging with a bottle of iron supplements. He doesn't trust himself not to grab the wrong medication, but iron supplements he can understand.]

What about this? I'm sure Tsumiki or Valentine could help you find the other ones you mentioned, but this should help some, right?

Those would be fine.

[He holds himself back from arguing about the merits of of blind picking assuming it would just lead to frustration. Even though it was a perfectly decent way to solve things.]

They would probably not want me to administer to myself for the other two anyway.

[Though, again, he was sure everything would have been fine.]

You should have said that to start with!

[Ugh. Hinata moves in to hand off the pill bottle before looking around for a cup so he can get the other some water.]

You should probably carry some of these with you when you leave the base. Just in case something like this happens again.

[And here's a cup of water. Don't die on him now.]

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